Shepherd Their Hearts with Biblical Wisdom

Shepherd Their Hearts with Biblical Wisdom

It’s easy to think my job as a dad is about keeping my kids clothed, fed, and out of trouble. And while those things matter, they’re not the heart of my calling. I’m not just raising kids. I’m discipling eternal souls.

The role of a father is to shepherd—to teach, guide, correct, protect, and lead their hearts toward God.
That’s not just a task—it’s a vital and sacred responsibility which has immediate and eternal ramifications.

THE CALL TO SHEPHERD

The Lord doesn’t tell us to simply manage our children. As if they were a checkbook to be balanced.
He calls us to teach them—diligently, daily, and personally.

“You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, and when you walk by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise.” —Deuteronomy 6:7 (ESV)

“Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.” —Ephesians 6:4 (ESV)

Notice these verses don't say: "Let the church or school do it."
They don't say: "Hope they figure it out."
They say: You. Dad. Lead them in the Lord.

WHAT SHEPHERDING LOOKS LIKE

Shepherding is more than reading a Bible story now and then. It’s about bringing God into the center of home life, so your children learn to see Him in everything. Imagine if the memories your children carry of their father are marked by an open Bible, a bowed head, bent knees in prayer, joyful singing, faithful service, and a calm, steady presence. What would that kind of legacy build in them?

Talk about God in ordinary moments.

When you discipline, comfort, or celebrate—point to His character.

• When you discipline, reflect God's purpose in loving correction:

  “For the moment all discipline seems painful rather than pleasant, but later it yields the peaceful fruit of righteousness…” —Hebrews 12:11 (ESV)

• When you comfort, mirror the gentleness of Christ:

  “I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.” — Matthew 11:29 (ESV)

• When you celebrate, remind them that joy is worship:

  “Whether you eat or drink, or whatever you do, do all to the glory of God.” —1 Corinthians 10:31 (ESV)

Read Scripture as a family.

If you have young children this can be challenging, and I'm right there with you. All of my children are under the age of five, so attention spans are shorter than a goldfish on espresso. But it doesn’t have to be long or fancy—just be consistent. Read one passage. Ask one question. Pray one short prayer.

Use mistakes as teachable moments.

Not just theirs—yours. When you confess and ask forgiveness, you're showing them what humility before God looks like.

Rules without relationship lead to rebellion. But grace with truth? That’s gospel-centered fathering.

SPEAK TO THE HEART, NOT JUST BEHAVIOR

C.H. Spurgeon once said, "Train up a child in the way he should go—but be sure you go that way yourself."
Whenever I talk with people who’ve abandoned the faith or wrestle with deep objections, I often hear a common thread—not something they were taught, but something they saw.
They grew up with rules, but without guidance.
They heard one thing from their parents or youth leaders—but saw another lived out.
The disconnect between words and actions left a mark. And that lack of integrity quietly pushed them away from the truth. So teach them by modeling a life consistently saturated in Christ.

It’s easy to fall into the trap of behavior management:

• "Be nice."

• "Say thank you."

• "Don’t hit your brother."

But if I only focus on behavior, I miss their heart.

Proverbs 4:23 (ESV) says:

“Keep your heart with all vigilance, for from it flow the springs of life.”

True fatherhood isn’t about controlling outcomes—it’s about shaping the heart, over time, with truth and grace.

HOW I’M TRYING TO LIVE THIS OUT

I’m learning to:

• Ask heart-level questions, not just surface ones.

• Invite my kids into conversations about Jesus—even right now when they’re young.

• Repent when I fail them, which is often, so they see the gospel in real time.

• Make the Word of God a normal part of life—not just Sunday mornings.

CLOSING REFLECTION

The world will disciple your children if you don’t. And let’s be honest—it already is. Every screen, every voice, every trend is shaping them. Sometimes blatantly, sometimes subtly—but if left unchecked, always effectively. It doesn't have to be this way. Your job, Dad, is to shepherd their hearts. Not perfectly. But faithfully. With the Word of God in one hand and your child’s hand in the other.

CALL TO ACTION

What’s one simple way you can bring God's truth into your parenting this week?
Read a verse. Ask a question. Sing a hymn. Pray out loud. Start small. Stay faithful. It matters more than you know.